5/27 -- 12:40 AM (Mountain Time)
I just got back from a wild party with Shelly (well, the wildest I'VE ever been to anyway). I was amazed at how many people were smoking there (of course, there was plenty of underage drinking going on as well). I did enjoy a guy named Bubba--ha ha, that sounds horribly wrong, but he was funny. I always feel rather awkward when i'm put in that situation; I wish there was a way i could prevent it all, but i know i can't, so i just have to kinda roll with it (without partaking, of course). The best way i can think of to influence them is to try to blend in as much as possible while being completely sober to make them realize they don't need that stuff, but then they would just be too drunk to notice/remember that i was sober anyway, so i ted to just tay out of the way and observe. This usually proves to be somewhat interesting, but it can get boring too. Oh well, Shelly had fun, so that's a plus. It looks like i'm sleeping with the cat tonight, and i've heard some bad stories about this cat, so hopefully i don't wake up with claws in my face.
SONG OF THE DAY: "The Way It Didn't Go" by Terence Martin
posted by Briggity Brak at 3:25 PM
4 Comments:
Oy. I've been dreading posting this entry ever since i wrote it 3 weeks ago (wow, was it really that long ago) because even as i was writing it, i knew it wasn't quite coming out the way i wanted. I have trouble putting my thoughts on this matter into words since it only really makes sense to me. Also, i feel that a fair portion of the people reading this could be considered part of the generalized "them" mentioned in this post, and i don't want to alienate any of "them." ;)
Actually, just last night, i got an interesting insight on this situation (how about that for timing on my random order blog): something was said to me to the tune of, "Hey, you've never even drunk in your entire life, so you don't even know what you're shaking your head at." This actually hit me kinda hard because, in a way, it showed that my "plan" had completely backfired. By refusing to EVER drink alcohol, people can throw that argument at me any time, and i really don't have an answer for them. It seems to make my whole "quest" a bit pointless. Also, it seemed to send things between that person and me into a downward spiral for the rest of the night. Not that i was offended by what was said or anything because i certainly appreciate the input, but things just seemed to indirectly build on that later in the night. Don't get me wrong, this doesn't, by any means, mean that i'm going to break down and give in or anything like that, but it just gets me thinking about the whole situation: it makes me feel like my sobriety is alienating people, which is obviously not what i want at all. It even gets me thinking whether i can seriously continue hanging out with "them," which scares me because i think "they" comprise a large percentage of this world including some of my best friends, and i've never felt that cutting myself off from people was ever the answer, but it's got me thinking. Wow, i think this comment may be even worse than the blog entry itself, but hopefully that will help end this comment drought i've had here...probably not.
June 18, 2006 3:54 PM
damnit ur the only one leaving comments on ur page now? am the only one who still reads these things? -matt
June 21, 2006 1:02 AM
wow, MATT'S reading this? cool!
I don't think you're the only one...my sister just posted a comment, but it was on a really random entry from a long time ago. Everyone else just doesn't comment because they're gay. I know some people were confused and didn't realize that i was still updating this, but i think i cleared that up...i hope...
June 21, 2006 1:08 AM
glad you "enjoyed" bubba.. i am sure he enjoyed you too. just to let you know.. the other night i was a designated driver - thanks, ur the best! did the killer cat ever attack u?
July 06, 2006 12:31 PM
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